I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
