I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
