i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
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Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
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Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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