Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime

(724): View more from Pennsylvania

...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname

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(860): View more from Connecticut

He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow

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(210): View more from Texas

I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.

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23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
Read it at the TFLN blog
(307): View more from Wyoming

I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."

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(317): View more from Indiana

I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.

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(636): View more from Missouri

I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.

(636): View more from Missouri

I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.

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(224): View more from Illinois

Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.

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