just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Randomize
