You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize
