how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Randomize
