I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize