Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Is Oprah even human
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
