so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
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