I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
