A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize