Rock
Scissors
Fuck
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
