At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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