Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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