he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
