And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
