ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
