I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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