Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
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