Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Randomize
