It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
