He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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