Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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