Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Randomize
