Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
