It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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