dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize