You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
She told me I should be a condom model.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
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