I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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