she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
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