the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
We are all done wearing pants today
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Randomize
