I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
