Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
NoShamevember. You game?
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Randomize
