i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
