He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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