these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
