You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize