You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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