ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
she looked like the before picture.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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