I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
