i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
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