I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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