Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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