The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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