Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
