She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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