I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
