seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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