Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Randomize
