oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Randomize
