How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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